Saturday, 6 August 2011

Do you remember the first time?

Hopefully, this is the last of the major "catch up" blogs and now that things have settled into more of a routine, I can put fingers to keyboard on a more regular basis.
I was going to put something along the lines of "No more, we all cry" but it appears that for quite a few of you, reading my ramblings is quite enjoyable.
I would like to thank you all for your very kind comments, though self depreciating as I am, I can't quite see why!!
Karen tells me that amongst the mothers at the health centre, I have become somewhat of a celebrity, with Karen being referred to as "the woman whose husband does the blog".
One parent was even kind enough to assume I was a writer by profession. I mean, come on?! Really?!
Others have asked when the book is out! Well, all I can say is that if you are a publisher, or know a publisher, then please get in touch!! It would be great to be paid for this rubbish! (There I go again).

Anyway, back to the blog in hand.

Since Edie's birth, everything has appeared to revolve around firsts.
We appear to be wishing her life away, constantly wanting her to do the next progressive action. 
We should just enjoy it, I know, but its hard not to want to see her develop.

Some of these firsts I am documenting for our sake (or Edie, when she is old enough to read this blog).
Some are worthy of elaboration.
All are important to me.

So, here they are.

First time she made me cry.
Week commencing 25th April 2011

Breastfeeding is brilliant but for the bloke in a relationship, its a divisive activity.
Whilst I had happily joked that Karen's breastfeeding would leave me free to lounge around or get a full nights sleep, the reality was quite different.
Breast feeding afforded the Karen the ability to soothe, calm and comfort Edie in the early weeks, where I had nothing to offer.
I found this very tough, especially when I was trying to give Karen a well needed break.
On several occasions, I would tell Karen to go to bed whilst I would look after Edie, only to have to go and wake her as only feeding could stop her crying.
This did get to me after a while as It really made me feel that I was failing as a Dad. I mean, I couldn't look after my daughter without having to constantly rely on Karen.
Thankfully, this feeling of helplessness passed (thanks in part to a breast pump and some feeding bottles!) and now I only feel useless most of the time.

First time Edie smiled at me.
3rd June 2011

Just heartwarming. I literally cant find any more words to say.

First time I was left alone with Edie.
11th June 2011

Having already been told off by Fliss France, for referring to this as "Babysitting" (apparently, its not babysitting if its your own child, its just parenting!), I was quite scared at the prospect of having to look after Edie on my own. Scared, particularly in relation to feeding her as she had only fed from a bottle once before.
This worry was to be unnecessary as my first foray into lone parenting consisted of me sitting on the sofa, watching telly (with one eye on the baby monitor), eating crisps and drinking lager whilst the little 'un was fast on upstairs.
Nowt to it, I thought (but didn't say, in case this prompted further instances, therefore increasing the risk of me having to actually look after her unaided)

First time we both left Edie.
24th June 2011

Edie was left in the very good care of my Mum and Dad.
Karen worried her self daft and couldn't wait to get home.
I got pissed and didn't want to leave the bar.
Old habits die hard.

First time I left Edie for longer than a working day.
18th - 22nd June 2011

I had to work away for a week.
This was unbelievably difficult. I experienced a feeling that I cant say I have ever experienced before.
Truly missing someone.
I can't say I've felt this way before. I think its due to the fact that whilst I've been away from loved ones in the past, I've always been able to communicate with them. I go away with work and I phone Karen every night.
Obviously, I couldn't do this with Edie and it upset me that she didn't really know where I'd gone.
I suppose the saving grace is that she isn't really capable of missing me, so at least it didn't bother her in any way.

The first roll.
23rd July 2011

After a great deal of effort, Edie rolled from her back to her front.
She then proceeded to scream the place down.
This is a recurring process!

Edie's first library card.
25th July 2011

Eager for Edie to be one of the next generation of library users, and keep these public services open as they should be, we made Edie a member of our local library.
This held special significance for Karen, as this was the library within whose walls she spent many happy hours as a child.
Edie's favourite book; That's Not My Monster by Fiona Watt.

Edie's First laugh.
5th August 2011

Only a small amount of noise but a definite chuckle.
Surprisingly, its was not to me whistling Last of The Summer Wine theme [click here for the video]
The new favourite appears to be a "beep beep" on her nose.
It would appear that she has a very simple sense of humour. Just like her Dad.

First time I was left on my own, with Edie, during the day.

Karen has left me for real this time, in the day!
Bloody hell!

As I don't spend every waking hour with her, as Karen does, I can't really read her as well as her Mum.
I don't really know what tired looks like.
I don't know what hungry looks like.
I don't know what to do if she starts crying and the milk in the fridge doesn't work.
Thankfully, this has been my view whilst I type this blog.

It appears that, yet again, I have "looked after" her on my own without too much drama.
That said, Karen isn't back yet and I'm watching the clock go round with interest!

So, that's about it I think.
This takes us up to now.

The only other first is a visit to the swimming pool tomorrow, but I'll leave that for next time.

As always, thanks for reading x


1 comment:

  1. Another fabulous post... especially the last line! Here's to many more firsts! xx